About Me

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I am a very funny girl. I'm that crazy type thats loud and can find myself even annoying at times. I don't ever have any regrets and try to live my life to my fullest, just like my mommy told me. I am young and I don't take a lot of crap but the stuff i have had has made me a stronger person.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

sisters are pains.

Samantha- I love that little girl to death. But lately it seems she wants more to do with Debra then her own sister. What happen to that little girl that i used to take care of when she was little. What happen to our big sis / lil sis bracelets that we were supposed to hang on too. What happen to her? Why the hell is she growing up so fast? I remember her being that baby that i would feed and get dress every morning. I wish i could be in Alabama for her but the simple fact of the matter is i cant stand being with Debra. If i could change time i would of taken off with my siblings and i so that we wouldn't get taking away and we wouldn't be diverted into different lives it seems like. If only at that time i was just a little bit more older and a little less dumber. I miss her truly and love her to death. I feel i did what was best for me, but if she is going to stay mad at me for this its only going to tear me apart on the inside. Why is life so ugly?

Sarah - I love Sarah and i tried for my longest to stick around her & helping the baby. I don't think she appreciated it enough. Between her and Jessie thinking I am so damn spoiled all the time it is making me a bad person. To me your not spoiled unless you have at least one of your biological parents living in the same house as you are in. <-- now thats one spoiled person. For me that chance seemed like it came and then left before my eyes. I'd fight everybody to get that chance in life again but sadly it wont happen. Just b/c i have a cell phone now means nothing really id rather have my family back. That also doesn't mean they have to pull a guilt trip on me. Sorry Sarah & Jessie for coming in and taking over your parents. LIFE IS SO UNFAIR! I am not using nothing but there love, something from a adult that i have never gotten in awhile. But i must say having a father and a mother bond with my aunt & uncle is kinda nice. For the longest i was never able to allow myself to attach with any other adult. I've also had really bad trust issues, though its all new and im still figuring out right and wrong i cant never be replaced with either of yall. Both yall came from them and i simply wasn't. But Jessie needs to get over herself. If she wanted a parent bond then she should of never gaven bullshit to the ones she "loves," i did it to Debra but that wasn't my family. Sarah, whom i love with all my heart can get on a persons nerves a lot. "I'm so glad your not my kid!" well i really dont wanna be b/c i know i wouldn't of gone through all this. Nothing toward Sarah though. And technically i would of never became strong as i am today if i didn't. I also learned a lot of my cleaning skills in foster care. And the thing that pisses me off the most is she comes into the house where she no longer lives and starts giving us commands. (Like the dog poop!) <-- that was not needed for. I have a hard time with adult authority toward some people. & sorry but Debra didn't give you the power of attorney it was giving directly to Auntie & Uncle. I understand if you dont want me around sometimes but you saying it in words can actually let me know that im not wanted forever.

Are we supposed to go through family like we do our friends?

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